stupid gm bankruptcy made me miss the showcase showdown
Those cock suckers. We need to know who's winning the hot tub and the vacation to the alps
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
writing the newer testament. It's the 3rd for the series. I'll update u the rule changes later.
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
You are a magnificent human being. I love you from head to toe. This wine is DELICIOUS.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
SERIOUSLY WHY DOES EVERYONE INSIST THAT THEY NEED TO SEE MY BOOBS
Because there's a shortage of perfect breasts in this world. You should start charging for viewings.
On another note; I'm three days away from being 1/12th of my way from not having sex for a year. I need to get laid.
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Swiping left on your brother's Tinder account is possibly the worst way to learn he broke up with his girlfriend.
I just got back like 5 minutes ago, I have two champagne bottles that I carried with me on the train home and a Dunkin donuts coffee cup full of stolen butter, I've been in a windowless room for the last 6 hours, time does not exist
what is your life
Free champagne that's what
Randomize
