we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
it's fine if we fail the bar, we were never going to satisfy the moral character requirement anyway
kinda considering buying a life alert for sophmore year
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
Thanks for buying me a sippy cup, its so pretty and everyone keeps telling me its probably the best gift anyone could have given me
I'm. Arresyed bur sierra ue obbe of mt vet friends. I hope we can tyajk ane gwt ob the same page. Ur aweaome ttyl.
Before I roll over explain to me why you're naked and on my floor.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Well I checked the bush outside his apartment building this morning, and he wasn't there... So I knew he was home.
He barged in the room with no shirt on, all fucking ripped with a half keg under one arm. Sara now calls him Bronan the Beerbarian
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
I need to stop getting high and watching documentaries. Wanna go to Japan with me and protest the mass genocide of dolphins?
it was also funny because at one point I woke up with my hands tied with a belt and we were both like what the fuck
So unmotivated today.
Who am I kidding. So unmotivated this decade.
Randomize
