whjeg hajt iyt
say what?
wanna hang out?
I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
My favorite part of the day is the 2 seconds of ignorance you have when you first wake up. Right before you remember where your mouth was last night.
NEWS FLASH: A bottle of wine can fit into a taco bell cup.
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
I just got checked out by a paramedic whilst their sirens were on. I'm doing something right
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
Please tell me there isn't another video of me on the toilet...
July fourth my place, drunken bubble slip n slide. Yes this is happening and yes I am 31
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
Casually on the bus at 830 in the morning with a box of cheezits and a bottle of fireball sticking out of my purse....
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Apparently someone was hiding in a storm drain dressed as Pennywise from it and offering passersby free penis enlargement pills.
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
