there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
I went out in the middle of the night to smoke my weed.. Didn't realize my dad was sitting on the patio doing the exact same thing..
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
you called your neighbor "slutsauce" then passed out on the stairway. not even sure why, but props to you.
I totally just friend requested the girl I met in jail last night so that I could give her back the sunglasses she lent me upon our release. See, I'm not a total delinquent.
He came for an unexpected visit and let's just say I shattered his illusion that girls don't watch porn
Sorry there's no emoticon for I got my period all over a guy's bed so I had to improvise. There isn't even a bed one
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
What alcohol should i drink Saturday to completely hate life?
Settled one third of the tab. Am going back for sex. Love you, make friends
I lost a shoe at the club last night, I think that's when I decided to go home.
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
