Id pretty much put it in anything at this point. Jello. Dogs. 12 year old boys
shut up i haven't hooked up with anyone since 45 minutes ago
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I just kept pointing at random people and telling the bartender to put it on their tab.
I have Retrograde Ejaculation as a side effect from one of my meds. Is this a respectable form of birth control?
If you're wondering about the pepper everywhere its for the ants and it was my doings. They hate pepper. You're welcome.
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
You stopped making out with some rando guy to tell him you weren't sure about your sexuality then proceeded to follow me down the street to make out with me
i just love the holidays, i hotboxed a gingerbread house last night
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
He spent three years trying to get a chance with me and finally broke me down. then he came in two minutes and was so upset he locked himself in the bathroom so I helped myself to his weed and left. Wanna get stoned?
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize
