Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
He will. He has no choice. What's he gonna do? Find a better fuck buddy? We both know that's not possible. I'm the ideal friend with benefit. Minus snoring and uneven tits.
I think Vodka is my favorite. Everything else ties for second.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
You make me want to do things that I'm pretty sure are illegal.
Dude. Don't do acid and go to Disney on ice. Hear my warnings. That snow monster will fuck your shit up.
Randomize
