Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
That's when you crack a 10am beer
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
Im a photoshop master, i successfully reduced the size of the pupils of all the girls I made out last night with to prove they were not that drunk. So glad the camera goes home with me.
eww mummy girl is here...
what the fuckk. i just want to hold her down, wax her eyebrows, and give her some morals.
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
I didn't think it was possible, but that girl next door is even louder when drunk.
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
I don't care how hungry or impatient you are. the highest setting on the microwave is 100% and you better not take it appart to add power. This is not the Enterprise.
It was a book called Gay Safari.
I'm so happy for you now that you have found your perfect porn novel.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
Decided to stay in tonight. Completely sober. Just got two drunken booty calls within 5 minutes of each other. This is my life.
I told him I might be pregnant and he said he'd buy me a test and a twix bar. I'm marrying him. Tomorrow.
Randomize
