Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
woke up this morning with pubes superglued to my face, not my pubes
He picked me up from the airport wearing nothing but a trench coat and a bow on his dick
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
Faces of meth called, they want their look back.
You might call them booze related cuts, I call it "partying so hard you sweat blood"
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
We're exchanging our favorite porn sites at 9 am. I think this brings our relationship to a whole new level
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
I have post one night stand depression
Randomize
