Ppl just aren't as funny as we are
Someone left a shot of disaronno in a champagne glass here this morning... flip a coin?
Is she bent over a couch yet or did daylight savings time throw off her usual schedule?
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
i feel like there is just so much pressure to sex him up, its like the weight of the world is on my vagina.
Bathtub drinking tim. I have no pool so I work with what I have
Hey could you buy me 2 bottles of arbor mist? I'm trying to get laid tonight
For sure. I'm slow cooking a 6 pound pork shoulder wrapped in bacon. If that doesn't scream "guys I'm going into culinary arts lets get drunk" I'm not sure what does.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ripped down his Kate Upton poster while we were having sex last night. Im gonna take that as a good sign.
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
SCUSE ME I KNOW YOU DIDNT DO THAT MUCH COKE IN 10 MINUTES
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
WHO CARES HE GIVES YOU TOE CURLING ORGASMS AND SAYS YOU HAVE KISSABLE SKIN AND RUNWAY MODEL HAIR....WHILE INTOXICATED WITH HIS BEST FRIEND. AND THEN HE SENDS YOU CUTE SELFIES OF THEM!!!!!!! WTF MORE DO YOU WANT FROM LIFE!!! DIE HAPPY ALREADY LADY!!!
Randomize