i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
he drove an hour to get eggs with me not even a blow job, just eggs.
I just remembered I opened the taxi door when I was at a red light last night and puked. And then when I was done I closed the door and told him he may proceed with caution.
All I want is tacobeell and your body
that's my favorite sentence you've ever said.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
Its like I've been given a sexual blank check.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
Reason # 294827284949272 i could never be a cop. I would just shoot. All the time. Ppl. Animals. Inanimate objects. Air.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Oral sex and brunch. The perfect sunday morning.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize
