She was lying the whole time!
She was a great actress
I was a great dumbass
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
dizzyuy bat. 3.453 lkos. hoit sx, now im single. blackouteed
You know that joke about taking tylenol pm and jerking off? you don't always win. sometimes you wake up in the morning naked lubed up cock in hand to the realator and would be perspective buyers laughing at you
Honestly... isn't she a psych major? how does she go through life NOT realizing that everything she does is a cry for help?
last karaoke night = doing dmx songs with a guy who threatened to stab me. so yeah I'm coming out.
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Starting the weekend with a pair of pants on which the zipper wont stay up. Is this a sign of things to come??
That money I left you should go to the stripper that fell asleep in your bed. Sorry
i'm covered in glitter and body paint WTF
We're showing the video later bring pizza
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
I think the cashier at 7/11 might be planning an intervention for me.
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