everytime someone famous vagina shows up in pics, i have to go check my own vagina to make sure mine dont look all wrinkledy and flabby like that....i want my lips plump and succulent
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
I am watching the symphony and have decided that violin players probably give really good hand jobs.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
If I wanted to fuck someone, I'd go for John. I'm meeting Bryan cuz I wanna get to know him better. And eventually fuck him. But not this Tuesday.
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
This bowl of cereal would be the size of a giant's bowl-piece. It's. that. big.
How much did you smoke??
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
It would be like if I said I had the cure for cancer and my explanation was I like turtles.
I'm using my dog as a pillow. He's cool with it.
dude ur drinkin a beer not ta capri sun. lose the straw
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Let's just say I peed the bed last night, and I wasn't in it alone. Whoooops
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