I've been at work for less than an hour and have pooped twice already. That's what happens when you start sleeping with your roommate and don't want to use the bathroom at home anymore.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
i just packed a bowl on a big bird place mat and smoked it in a spaceship with a slide. i love babysitting.
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Haunted Houses: fun, lame, or love to sneak off and get fingered in the dark alley way?
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
Next time you have him paint you an outfit so you can do you walk the street naked TAKE A SHOWER BEFORE YOU GET IN THE BED. MY sheets look like like an acid trip
Just took an Adderall with Pedialyte so I think that's a valid answer to "how are you doing"
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Nothing says hangover like being in the doctors office getting a tampon removed from deep inside
The whole country is going to hell in a handbasket but I got a grade A fucking and don't particularly care.
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