How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
ive realized i need to start an "avoid moving in with my parents after graduation" fund
I'd like to be considered more than just his fuck buddy thanks. IVE BEEN RISKING PREGNANCY FOR SEVEN GODDAMN MONTHS I DESERVE THE TITLE OF GIRLFRIEND
She may be a slut, but at least she's a dedicated slut. She's always super tan and has her shit shaved in really cool designs.
yea. Don't mess. He will heal me. But my blowjobs will be historical.
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
So my quick shower turned into a "lay in the shower and let the hot water reign over you because you are too hungover to wash your hair" shower. I'll be there closer to 1:30!
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
So let me get this straight I was getting drunk with our science teacher from high school and you got drunk with an 82 year old woman who invited you back to her house and made you sandwiches.
Yes.
He tried to kiss me in the middle of hooking up... it was a deal breaker. I got off him and left.
So making out with chicks at the bar is fine and dandy, but your booty call can't kiss you? You have the strangest fucking rules...
Randomize
