If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
This girl wants me to lick her pits
pits??
Yeah pits, I think I still go for it though
just dd'd my mom home while she begged me to let her drunk dial my ex, jammed out to party in the usa, and then passed the fuck out. thanks for the genes mom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
guess what. just found out I had mono. no wonder alcohol didn't taste good on nye
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
We shouldn't eat pizza in the pool
We r drinking tequila out a glass bottle and smoking weed underwater, pizzas the least of our concern
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
I may have just tried to argue quantum entanglement as the reason I was still in her bed.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Just slather his penis with BBQ sauce
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
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