yeah i like to chase my xanax with prozac and then viagra. you're up...and then you're UP
who the fuck tagged pancake nipples on my profile picture?
im in his phone as 'great ass to tap'
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I save people's lives for a living, but I want to ruin his marriage.
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
that's why you don't digest questionable powders from girls wearing tutus at a dirty club
They installed a lotion dispenser in the bathroom at work... its like they want me to masturbate on the clock...
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
DICK PUNCH EXTRAVAGANZAAAAAA!!!!!
HOLD ONTO YOUR PANTIES AND SAY GOODBYE TO THE REMAINDER OF YOUR INTEGRITY
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
I finally had to say "that's the hole where I pee" for him to understand.
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
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