I dont like him- his parents were home and he hid me in his closet like anne frank
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
believe me... letting the man that delivered you from your mother's vagina do shots off your stomach is really fucking awkward.
My gaydar just like overheated and exploded watching the male figure skaters on the olympics
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Hate the very realistic pregnancy dreams. Like my dream when I birthed the pirate ships. SO REAL...
I'm still not completely convinced I'm not pregnant. I just dipped beef jerky in cream cheese frosting.
I was standing when I hit it. I barely made it to the couch before the walls started turning into people.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
That moment when you see yourself in a security camera feed and realize you forgot a bra. And pants.
Which sister was it? The one I accidentally hit when my shoe flew off or the one I ate candy off of when we were high?
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
all i remember is arguing with the chick that yahoo was better than google
all you were doing was yelling YAHOOOOO in her face
so i won
Thanks for driving us home last night. Also, blanket apology for anything I may have said/done. I blacked out sometime near the t-shirt cape incident
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