All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
3 inches of snow, below zero windchill and i just saw a dude in a wrangler with no doors, shorts a beanie and burton snow goggles. God i love college in colorado
Dude just bought condoms some sad fuck next to me buying a pregnancy test he gave me a look like he'd pay me millions to switch places
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
I just need to go to a bar tonight wrapped in an American flag singing the national anthem
I totally cried the whole time and then screamed out my new therapists name....
Well, I found the missing blow... in my fucking suitcase... THIS MORNING. Yeah, I flew from FL to NY with blow in my suitcase yesterday.
I told you to check, dude
Yeah, AFTER I checked my bag and I was already sitting on a plane. Oh well. I figured worst case I'd do like 15 hours in county and I was totally prepared for that anyways. I always prepare for that when we hang out.
I feel like I've asked you "are you okay?" one too many times in the last 48 hours. You're hopeless.
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
also i don't know what you guys ate last night but he broke the toilet
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
How do you say, "I love you, but i prefer sex with someone else." in a good way? Ponder that over a jack and coke and get back to me.
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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