You should have seen her outfit yesterday. It was like pretty woman before Richard Gere gave her money to buy a new outfit.
i have a $600 bill for my ER visit in which they did nothing but suggest to me that i am an alcoholic.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
cashier rang me up and said, "white people are funny." like i'm NOT the only white person to buy just lettuce & 40 glow sticks
There's a guy in here whose face looks like it would be perfect between my legs.
So maybe putting the blacklight above the futon wasn't the best idea...
So, I'm tripsitting Ruben cause he's on LSD, and he's starting to eat the chair because 'it is evil' according to him... I can't choose: should I stop him or film it?
Steve brought 6 joints and 2 bottles of makers mark, Josh shat himself in the pool, and Amy blew me. Hope that extra 3 dollars an hour for working overnights is still worth it.
I gave him head while despicable me 2 played in the background. I think I disappointed the minions
I don't need to marry the guy. I just need some filthy, shameful wish fulfillment sex and then live out the rest of my life on the bean farm.
He said he doesn't "believe" in cuddling. Can you come get me?
before i could order beers she was on stage 69ing with a stripper
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
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