i just googled 'classy porn'. high, low, i dunno i just got bored of cum shots.
Suck a a big bag of reindeer cock bud. Sent from church. See you in hell
I apparently tried to stop my spending of money by sealing the top of my wallet with gum
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
We've been watching Scooby Doo and having sex for the past 36 hours, so life is great
I think I died and satan has brought me back to life and I'm paying for my sins with this hangover
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
