yeah worst sex in my life. plus i think her little brother was in the room.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
it was 6 in the morning, and you cried until i put mulan in. then you proceeded to say every word, not to mention sing along... stop drinking.
just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
It was more like a tour de entire bottle of wine in 14 minutes
Do you know how I hurt my ankle or my shoulder? Or the origin of any of the following mystery bruises: left quad, left wrist, right elbow. Thanks for playing.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
He is full of southern hospitality and I want to be full of him.
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
