Small dicks are the new regular sized dicks.
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Im sure that doesnt mean its ruined... It was your bithday you get a free "im drunk at 7 am" card
over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
Apparently she held up my head the entire 40 minutes, convincing the cab driver that I was okay
You promised me a handle of vodka if I took home her ugly friend. Thanks to law class I took for the 2nd time I know that's a unilateral contract asshole
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
I just walked past a guy banging a chick in the back of his car.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
Then James put his arms through the window and grabbed him, like he was Robocop. A nerdy, portly Robocop.
Who is this?
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
You burped in your shoe and whispered 'you're mine now'
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
Randomize
