Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
party is dying down. we just wrote whore in the yard with gas. Photos to come.
I'm glad my gym is open 24 hours..I stopped in on my way home to puke from the bar
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found pics of us from Mardi Gras last year. Your boob job really is better than mine.
we knew you were done when they played It's All Coming Back To Me Now by Celine Dion and you started crying
also, I heard you can donate your eggs for like $8gs....hellloooo mediterranean vacation. thank youuuu future babies!!!
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
we def had a heart to heart that turned into a BJ last night
The only thing I like when I am high is sex. And Cheez Its. But mostly sex.
He threw me over his shoulder and carried me outside, all the while drinking from the bottle of rum he was holding, while my ex watched. I'm winning the break-up.
You don't know how skeptical I was about letting a guy with braces go down on me
I'm tired of the topic. I sent him a pic of my vagina to change it.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
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