Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
There's been so much talk around your vagina it's like a local celebrity
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
It never fails.. every time I have a dick in my mouth he calls me.
is it mean that i live tweeted about whether or not my roommate and her bf were having sex or were wrestling?
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
You came over, called every girl Comrade Heather, and then declared that you were an Eagle, and we were your young.
So all in all, a good night.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Do you have any idea how hard it is to iphone keyboard type "roflcopter" when intoxicated?
Grass is always greener, Allison, grass is always greener
The grass is drunker and I'm lying down on it
Well the good news is ill probably have my new boobs by the time he sees me naked
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
now whenever i pass that house all i can think about is how i pooped in their yard..
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
