we were having sex and she freaked out when i said nipple
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
The voicemail says i shouldn't bother ever showing my face there again, i don't understand
We visited your boss last night. guess you wont be paying the rent this month, eh?
had to bail. she had her cat tattooed on her
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
Then pass out next to me, I'll be under a pong table or a park bench. Really depends on the weather during Mifflin
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
I was looking threw the photos on my phone. There is 8 different ones of us peeing on things.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Erin was right. There were bees at the after hours.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
