My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
Yeah...don't think he was sober. He kept screaming "I fucking love this game!". It was his Chase app.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
Now I have to set an alarm for less than 6 hours from now to wake her up, get her showered and get her to her first day of tutoring a kid from her church. WTF is my life?
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Let it be known that on this day, the 26th of October, in the year 2016, I successfully put both of his balls in my mouth at once.
I just walked into my kitchen and my little brother is standing with his face two inches from the clock, staring at it, and eating an apple. I asked wtf he was doing and he just goes "the hour hand is moving VERY slowly".
A young (I'm going to guess late middle school age) kid shouted at me from the crosswalk GAS PUMP OF SHAME! I have peaked in life.
It was the scariest thing ever having a flame that close to my balls...
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
Hi I love you will you be up for a while!
That exclamation point was a drunk decision
Randomize
