i hope push ups and a ton of orange juice gets rid of chlamydia
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
he wont speak to me right now because i told him it must suck knowing he'll never be as good as edward cullen..idiot.
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
She was literally passed out in a cubicle with a flask in her hand. I LOVE finals week!
They ran out of ice at the party, so I fixed my drink with frozen broccoli....the show must go on!
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Just go read my twitter... There's a play by play. It starts with a penis pump
World Cup Drinking Game: Take a shot every time they call a foul for something we don't understand. Gotta risk it to get the biscuit.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
I dont understand why so many people are content staying in and avoiding alcohol and sex
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
Randomize
