I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
Nothing ended up happening last night because he couldn't get my overalls or fanny pack off. I woke up this morning with one strap over my overall shorts on, my fanny pack wrapped around my chest, and the baby doll still tied to my hand. Ugh white trash parties!
I woke up with a crunchy, pink Pepto streak through my hair, no recollection of the last 6 hours of my night and the feeling that all the hotel's staff knew me on a first name basis.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
She saved the condom from the first time we did it.
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Ok, was I really fucked up or was there a chick from Norway in the ice cream shop teaching us Norwegian last night?
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
One eye has cum in it and the other has sunscreen
summertime
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
apparently i ended up downloading "thats amore", giving him head, and singing it... all at the same time
Randomize
