We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
I'm ashamed of you 12 hours later and 200 miles away
I'm doing this for my boobs. They miss him.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Just did an upsidedown spineboard shot. Gotta love lifeguard parties.
I mean we had sex in a crib. You tell me how my night was.
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
You turned to me, winked, whispered "man the harpoons" and walked out with the fat chick
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
Just realized I used a picture of my little sister to holler at a guy, only 3 months old and she's already my wingman.
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
I vaguely remember a drunken mid sex pinky promise to not let it get weird.
Crawl out into the sunshine and off your vibrator for 7 minutes
Randomize
