No more parties with babies... I can't do that again.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
As for the 14 hours of vodka. I am all that is man.
I would have gladly let him decapitate me with the way he was biting on my neck.
He woke me up at 3 am, turned me on, then changed his mind. There is no way he is getting out of twilight now.
Do you have any pictures of me mounting animals that aren't on Facebook?
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
He can keep it, but if he asks for anything else i'm just going to start pissing on things.
I have a fantastic sense of humor but being called a merman isn't funny
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
I just want my kids to know I fucked some really hot dudes before their father.
You're going to scar your kids
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
Are we allowed to ho on the roof?
Randomize
