Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
the girl i fucked last night woke up this morning, disoriented and looked at me, and said "oh, you're hot." and went back to sleep.
No now hes going to beat me to our goal of getting someone to have sex in the library. I hate periods.
I don't know what to judge you more for.
not to mention it took an hour of antique roadshow to calm my dick down
My overnight senior got drunk and hooked up with Kaylee on Sunday. I checked Facebook and he already put down his deposit for next year. This school should pay me a commission.
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
She just drunkenly falls over and yells " I lost my footing!" in a british accent and then proceeds to run into the wall... did you spike her water?
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
So im waiting for someone at grand central and i look up AND THE ENTIRE BALCONY IS FILLED WITH BOY SCOUTS I AM TERRIFIED
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
First thing that comes on in the morning is kanye's I can't hold my liquor. yeezus lives.
Operation: 12 Dick pics of Christmas was a sweeping success, thanks for asking!
I always can't wait to see you but when there's also an opportunity to get naked it elevates to an entirely different level
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