Me too!
trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
so as we were driving to pick up my grandma from old navy she procedes to yell into our open window.. "I'll make ya holla fo a dolla" umm...
Princesses don't give blow jobs
Last night I walked out of the bar got in a cab asked the cabi to circle the block. he did and brought me right back to the bar. I paid him $7 thanked him and walked back into the bar.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
He is indeed a crazy mutha fucka. But mark my words. MARK MY WORDS. My job has placed me at the same party as Tom Cruise. I. Am. Fucking. The. Crazy. Out. Of . That. Alien . Fucker.
The drug dealer had chickens in his house so I know it was good stuff.
And the sky opened up and god said.... "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!!!!"
you didnt realize it, but you puked in the bushes in front of a church and yelled "GOD IS DEAD"
I just found one of your beard hairs in my oatmeal.
Why was I lying under a truck last night?
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
I made out with the hosts' boyfriend, infront of her, drank way too much, slept in my car and convinced everyone that I'm really a nice person. If that's not skilled lying, I don't know what is.
Randomize
