ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
zippers are such a cool invention
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
One minute we were getting noise complainted by the security guards the next I was shotgunning a beer with them
im getting coffee to go get coffee.
Im throwing up in my trash can so I can go throw up in the toilet. We're basically on the same level.
He literally said to me "go ahead and answer that text message while I eat you out"... Maybe I AM the relationship type...
I feel miserable and there's nutella all over my phone
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I'm going to pound you from behind over a table at the bar while I pull your hair and call you a whore...please pass along that message to Rob
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
whatever. i don't need to be drunk to tell you i'd suck your dick if you had one.
Pretty sure I'm partying in a onesie right now.
Next time I think it’s a good idea to hook up with any of your wife’s family members or friends just kick me in my dick
Randomize
