I guess there's a 50 percent chance that it was her that wet my bed.
I got raped by $2 you call it's. I'm still hammered. And mentoring high school kids. My life is a joke.
too bad you live with your parents still
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
He wanted a handjob during a John Wayne movie. I just couldn't find it in my heart to disrespect that man. John Wayne that is.
When that rick ross song came on he started ripping up dollar bills and pouring out drinks on the floor. I'm all for ignorance but it was a little excessive for a wedding
I've been very busy/drunk lately... Sorry.
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
There's scrapes on the inside of both my thighs.. Because we wanted to get drunk and climb trees naked.
I mean I'm not gay but a hundred bucks is a hundred bucks
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
He's a cop. Do you know how many times I've said fuck the police? This is my chance. I'm taking it.
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