the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
Holy shit. This 2 year old just told me her nipples were for her boyfriend. Hello future leaders of america
I have reached the point in my life where I realized this is what I'm going to do for the rest of my life. Eat, shit , bar, drink, drank, drunk.
You look cute and you are awesome. And that means something coming from a judgmental bitch
i woke up in his neighbors pool house. Not sure how I got here but there is people swimming outside. how do I escape?
just fucking run.
I'm such a good drunk match marker. You single, you single... Drunk friend meet single boy. BOOM illegitimate baby made!
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
My husband has seen you naked more times this week than me. I don't consider it a bad thing since you keep bringing the booze to our house. And because my tits are bigger.
An old biker dude just flirted with me at Food City. I enjoyed it. God damn I need to get laid.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
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