Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
I woke up this morning and I couldn't find my coffeetable. wtf?
Sometimes, in the course of human events, people get lit on fire.
thanks for texting me "so many asians" at 1am...
there were a lot.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
If he doesn't fuck you on the 4th of July, he doesn't really love this country.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I wanted to say, you're welcome for your orgasms, thanks for not returning the favor, Needledick
Randomize
