apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
now that im off birth control, the world is a much scarier place
only you would end up drunk at a subway with a one-eyed homeless man
He still hasn't made a move, so I slept with his brother last weekend. Maybe sibling rivalry will motivate........
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
Your actions as of last night have earned you over thirty new nicknames.
I'm scared because his knowledge of star trek is turning me on
he told me he didn't like my name so he was going to call me Casey instead
I am the oldest one here and I STILL feel like I need an adult. help.
look, im sorry that i yelled at your little brother, threw my car keys at him and smashed a stale cookie with a pool cue, but i swear to god i didn't poop on the floor. it was one of your dogs.
Thank you for always being there for me.
Sorry wrong derek... Do u have any weed?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
