There's a lady carrying her kids toy animals in a crown royal bag. Mom of the year.
don't worry dude, we didn't fuck on your bed out of respect for you
couldn't find a condom?
basically
Dude, I swear her tits are going to give me a concusion.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
i just saw that homeless guy who dresses like the cat in the hat at the liquor store. i guess he got enough change to have a good weekend. oh the places he'll go
Her face is stuck to the frozen jager bottle. I think shes ok with it
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
She just started crying. With my dick still inside her. Something about her grandpa.
Well I mean I HAD done a pretty good job of not pooping myself through the years
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
How many Hail Marys does a girl need to say to get some quality nudes?
Randomize
