The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
So I went out tonight...met a guy who slightly resembled my dad,huge creeper, he asked me to "hang out" so I gave him my moms number since he was more her type:)
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
a stripper queefed in my friends mouth last night and it reminded me of you. miss you
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
I am not apologizing for rubbing my balls on your leg...that is a risk you take when you come out to the bar with me
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
i'd say i'm about at weeping-uncontrollably-in-a-puddle-of-my-own-tears-and-urine level
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
your vagina must have magic restorative powers I feel rested and powerful this morning.
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