I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
I just opened a gallon of milk that is good through the 10th of January- I hope I can say the same for myself.
I seriously fake cumming more than i poop.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
If I were you I'd use my green card to do more coke and less talking
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
So, I without a doubt haven't used the bag I'm now carrying since we were dating. Just had to discreetly throw out an unopened magnum in a bus station.
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Shooting a bottle rocket from my penis was entirely justified. Twenty bucks is twenty buck no matter how you look at it
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
I broke another vibrator the other day. Abstinence is not for me.
I decided we werent gonna go for round 5 when he started trying to have a serious conversation about how blessed he is to have such a nice penis
He has a point, the man's penis is a legend.
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