I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
she peed on how many people?
Someone said we're out of ice. You collapsed on the spot and started sobbing, saying 'but where will all the polar bears live". That drunk.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
you flashed my boyfriend last night so i tackled you to the floor. you may be a bit sore.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
Just had an hour long talk with a woman, turns out she's the mom of the guy i lost my virginity to. Even better his dog was also present.. Meeting the family at its best?
NO SHITSVILLE I just saw a homeless dude punch a pigeon that flew by him
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
I'm just now starting to feel better... I remembered sleeping on the floor. I was peeing and saw his rug and it looked so comfy
I can't adult today.
Take a nap and try again
I have to buy a couch. There's nothing more adult than buying a couch on a Tuesday.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Randomize
