the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
Motorboating on a tuesday night. not too shabby....
I just walked in on my dad looking at porn. is there protocol for this?
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm basically just sitting in the porta poTty finishing my bottle of champagne bc I am too lazy to carry it back to the tailgate
What's grosser: using a dirty sex towel as an oven mitt? or using the oven to reheat superbowl bean dip for dinner?
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
You know you have crossed to the dark side of marriage when a nap is more important than jacking off
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You still owe me one bodily function mess clean up.
You pee on the floor one time and you never hear the end of it...
He passed out with his shoes on 20 minutes till midnight, and I didn't have a sharpie so I took the cheese whiz and filled his exposed ass crack.
Randomize