Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
my room smells like sperm. sweet.
you didnt remember my name all night. you kept referring to me as "the blonde with the fat ass"
What do I have to do to get you laid? I talked to that girl with the ugly dog for 45 minutes trying to get you in, and all you said was "Steven Spielberg is my favorite director."
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
I hid drinks in her bathroom closet.... like a squirrel... a squirrel who knew she was going to get cut off soon
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
Why is there a condom in the dishwasher...
Your dress got me laid by one of Obama's Secret Service members. Patriotic duty, check.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
You're best friend just tackled me....naked....brought me to his room where he had freshly baked cinnamon rolls. I didn't know he could cook
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
sorry i got drunk at sunday brunch and force fed carrot sticks to your cat
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