they say Disney World is the happiest place on Earth. It's a close second to the Super 8 on route 18. That place holds some great memories.
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
My cell phone fell out of my shirt pocket while tying my shoe on an escalator....which was followed by me being accused of trying to sneak an upskirt photo and being violently shoved down the top of the escalator. How's YOUR day?
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
I'm pretty sure I asked his brother if he was gay while drunkenly falling to the ground.
He said something last night about making crepes, but after getting pissed on in bed, I question everything.
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
thanks for the bj man. also make sure you close the gate behind you. the chickens are out.
Randomize
