Well we can cross off dogs, dating sites, and real life as ways to help you meet a chick.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
you crashed our wine night double date and sat on the floor eating cheese talking about how big his dick is.
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
Did you get an erection too during Paul Ryan's speech?
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
Her hotness level dropped from an 8 to a 2 as soon as I walked into her place. It REEKED of cat piss and there was no litter box and NO CATS.
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Banging to Billy Joel pandora is like russian roulette. But I made him cum to Let It Be so I we both walked away victors
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
If I die tonight, you and your brother can split my money evenly for college only.
all $38?
Yeah. We're taking this fuck buddy relationship to the next level. Sober weekday sex.
Are you sure you found YOUR underwear?
Randomize
