Just smoked a bowl with the exterminator. I think my day is more productive.
i went through the entire semester and only just now realized there's a girl in my history class that i've hooked up with.
Why do I have peacock feathers super glued to my body?
Where are you and why am I suddenly responsible for your taquitos?
Considering the last guy I had sex with was gay, this was a huge improvement.
I feel like a squirrel prepping for the winter on dollar beer nights.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
Lots of alcohol last night skiing this morning = me throwing up off chairlift
Also, am I the only one who noticed he didn't fuck you until after you were technically a cripple? Or am I reading into this too much? Congrats on that btw
I cannot FaceTime with your penis
WHY DID I INFORM THE ENTIRE BATHROOM I DONT HAVE AN STD?!?!?!!
He said that he made a girl squirt to the ceiling and I got curious
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
this kid sitting diagonally in front of me is searching "cheap bongs" on google. hahahhaaha. who does this kid think he is?
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