i was unaware that anal sex sometimes ends with shit on the bed.
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
Do you know how awkward it is to call the bar from last night and ask if they found my leggings?
All I learned from that experience was that drinking scotch out of a crunk goblet was bad news.
She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'll offer my penis as collateral. You can hold title to it till I pay you back.
he said i balance and complete him. i feel sick
he was definitely TRYING to give me herpes.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
He held my hair back for me while i vomited in my driveway last night and i repayed him by farting mid-heave.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
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