oh. my. god. the guy i hooked up with last night is currently wearing a dress.
My gyno told me the birth control she prescribed reduces sex drive
wats the point then?
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
she was laying naked in the stream looking for "ribbays", which is apparently drunk for frogs.
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
I just remembered that I did shots out of a gay mans crotch. And there's someone saved in my phone as "Miranda knows where my car is"
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
It was a mess. I sat on the kitchen floor with maple whiskey and cried into a bowl of poutine. I've never even been to canada
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
Just got an email from match.com trying to match me with My ex..I nearly pissed myself laughing
Randomize
