Do you think this abandoned cigarette has herpes? cuz I'm tempted.
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
we were going to warn you, but we veto-ed that idea somewhere between "this is the stupidest thing we've ever done" and "let's order a pizza"
he kept asking me "do you love it? tell me you love it" as I was riding him.
and...?
I told him it was alright.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
Threw up 3 times on the lawn mower and then proceeded to crash it into a tree root and break it.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Oh my fucking god that cat looks just like you after you accidentally took Ketamine
I'm sitting here with a heating pad and a fan on me eating snow caps off of my boobs
It wasn't exactly a dick pic. It was more like a body shot with a hint of wiener.
AND I woke up to eggs in my bra. Thanks Taco Cabana...
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
never have sex with a mint flavored condom on. my vagina is on fire.
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