you know you're not getting laid when you start breaking awkward silences with quotes from Robot Chicken
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
just came on the shower curtain. sorry housekeeping.
his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
the only thing coherent you said from what i saw of you is when you were throwing up, i asked if you were done and you just "uh huh you know what it is"
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
this weekend destroyed me...my brain feels like the curly fry at the bottom of the bag. GAhhh come save me
that's ecstasy for ya. now I'm kinda in the mood for jack in the box.
Nope, sorry. Already took my bra off. All down hill from here. My next act will be crying, singing, and eating girl scout cookies in the shower. You can come watch the shit show though.
I just watched Matt try to put on a pillowcase thinking it was a t-shirt.
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
