every time i drive by the road she lives on, i scream in the car "i'm sorry i'm sleeping with your boyfriend!" makes me feel less whore-y.
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
if youre pregnant and ruin my spring break i'll never forgive you.
can we just pause for one second and address the fact that balls were out last night
I'd rather be sodomized with a fullly decorated Christmas tree.
His cat must have been laying on his dick, because now my face is covered in hives
30 year old woman with braces and crocs came into the store today with her boyfriend. what am I doing wrong.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I WOLD FCUK YUO INTOO THE MOON
THE MOOOOOOOON
New war strategy! The ex-girlfriend of my ex-girlfriend is now my twice a week booty call!
Apparently my thong was thrown in the cornfield last night. No one will tell me why.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
The closest I'll come to committing is leaving sex toys at their house
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
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